It is hard for adults to talk about the election, inauguration, and the new Presidency. It is also difficult figuring out how to talk to neurotypical kids about the election. Even more difficult yet, is figuring out how to talk to kids who have less verbal skills. Regardless of whether your candidate is in power, you're neutral, or adamantly opposed, here are some strategies for discussing the election with your children.
Step 1: Start the conversation
Kids are talking about Donald Trump taking office and it's causing anxiety in most kids regardless of political affiliation because of rumors running through schools. Parents first need to find out what their child(ren) think they know. Some may be worried that people are attacking the Capital right now because they’ve seen videos of it and think it is happening still. This happened right after 911. Kids may be afraid they will deported even if they don't have any recent family immigration history. Sometimes kids come up with really outrageous ideas of their own that we won't always predict.
Ask- Parents can get this info by simply asking “Hey! What do you know about this whole election thing?”
Draw- For students who have limited language or are less eager to talk you can draw about what's happening. This will provide less concrete information but can be a starting point to expand upon. “Oh! That looks like a house. That reminds me of the White House. I wonder if your friends told you that there is a new President.”
Use AAC- Model with AAC devices some things they may have heard in conversations. When they respond, use those as jump off words for conversations- even if it might have just been babbling.
Step 2: Reality Check
Correct Errors- Correct errors that the child has expressed and give truthful but calm leaning answers. Example: Tell the child no one is attacking the Capital. If it feels upsetting or scary to you that the people from Jan 6th were pardoned/released- leave out that side comment unless your kid has asked. This step is to reduce anxiety, not build new steps
We can do all of this with those drawings and AAC conversations as well.
Step 3: Don't catastrophize in front of kids
Everyone is stressed out. It is important that we don't list the worst case scenarios to them and that we keep energy calm. Try to keep the news off. If you want to keep your child educated that's fine, but plug the fire hose and let information out mindfully.
Don't forget that just because our kids don't look like they are paying attention- they often are.
Step 4: Give them action items
If they are excited about something or worried about something, help them come up with a way to take action. It can be writing a letter to a politician, doing a service project, or using any other creative outlets.
Letters- For letters you can use sentence starters like: “The thing I like right now is” or “The thing I want to change is”
You can use “fill in the blanks” as well. For these you can leave a spot, give word choices, or even picture choices. Here is an example:
My name is ____. I am _____ years old. (choose one) Safe water / TikTok is important to me. I want you to fix it by ________ (or choose one) making a law / taking to Congress. Thank you for your help.
Signed _________
Service project- This can be very involved like raising money with a lemonade stand or a food drive for the animal shelter. It can also just be picking up trash for an hour on a random walk. This gives your child something to feel like they're helping the community.
This can also include political actions like protests or volunteering with social action groups for any cause.
Creative outlets- Encouraging kids to do art around feelings is helpful whether or not they can talk about it. There are a lot of art activities that may help. Things like listening to music and painting feelings can be helpful. Vision boards are another fun activity. Angry scribbling works too. I usually set about various mediums and allow the child to use the one that speaks the most to them.
Step 5: Discuss Time and Place
Talk about how their feelings are valid and should be expressed but that there are situations or places to talk about politics and other times we should not. Your values may differ on what those times are so teach what you believe. Try not to instill shame about the topic but that the topic can cause big feelings and we don’t want to catch people off guard.
Prepare them for the fact that their friends (or friends parents!) may believe different things than we do and tell them how to respond. If parents want to prepare their child to argue their beliefs then coach that. It may be worth teaching the script “I disagree and I would like to talk about something else” as a way to set a boundary and move on as well.
Step 6: Give them grace and love
Sometimes all they need is a snuggle… Their friends are stressed, their teachers are stressed, you're likely stressed. Everyone is stressed right now. So- they may act out because everything is a little harder. Feel free to offer a hug, even if it might accidentally reinforce a tantrum, if you see your kid is hurting.
As we work through this time where kids have to manage social interactions that are filled with so much intensity it's important we don't pretend like nothing is happening. It is and they can tell. Hopefully these tools are a helpful tool to teach you and your child(ren) to self manage.
Comentarios